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上饶去老年斑多少钱百家共享

2019年12月06日 08:27:39 | 作者:康泰频道 | 来源:新华社
Can heterosexual men and women ever be “just friends”? Daily experience suggests that non-romantic friendships between males and females are not only possible, but common. However, a new study suggests that men, relative to women, have a particularly hard time being “just friends.”异性恋男女之间有没有纯粹的友谊?日常经验告诉我们,男女之间纯粹的友谊不仅仅是可能的,而且还很普遍。但最新研究表明,与女性对男性的态度相比,男性更不可能把女性当作普通朋友看待。In order to investigate the viability of truly platonic opposite-sex friendships, researchers brought 88 pairs of undergraduate opposite-sex friends into...a science lab. In order to ensure honest responses, the researchers not only followed standard protocols regarding anonymity and confidentiality, but also required both friends to agree to refrain from discussing the study, even after they had left the testing facility. These friendship pairs were then separated, and each member of each pair was asked a series of questions related to his or her romantic feelings toward the friend with whom they were taking the study.为了研究异性之间是否存在真正纯粹的友谊,研究人员挑选了88对大学生异性朋友参加了一项科学实验。为了确保大家给出诚实的回答,研究人员不仅遵从了匿名、保密等标准试验协议,而且要求异性朋友双方避免讨论这项研究,甚至是在试验结束后。这些异性朋友被分开,研究人员会单独询问每个人是否对参加试验的另一位朋友有好感等一系列问题。The results suggest large gender differences in how men and women experience opposite-sex friendships. Men were much more attracted to their female friends than vice versa. Men were also more likely than women to think that their opposite-sex friends were attracted to them—a clearly misguided belief.研究结果显示,男性与女性对待异性友谊的态度有很大差别。与女性对男性的态度相比,男性更容易喜欢上女性朋友。男性也更容易觉得女性朋友喜欢他们,这当然是一种错觉。In fact, men’s estimates of how attractive they were to their female friends had virtually nothing to do with how these women actually felt, and almost everything to do with how the men themselves felt—basically, males assumed that any romantic attraction they experienced was mutual, and were blind to the actual level of romantic interest felt by their female friends. Women, too, were blind to the mindset of their opposite-sex friends; because females generally were not attracted to their male friends, they assumed that this lack of attraction was mutual. As a result, men consistently overestimated the level of attraction felt by their female friends and women consistently underestimated the level of attraction felt by their male friends.事实上,男性对异性有多喜欢自己的估计几乎和异性朋友的真实感受毫无关系,而仅与男性的自身感受有关。基本上,男性会假设自己体会到的所有浪漫吸引之情都是相互的,完全不知道异性朋友对自己到底有多大好感。女性也对男性的这种心态一无所知,因为女性通常对自己的异性朋友没有好感,她们也会假定对方也不喜欢自己。结果就是,男性一直会高估异性对自己的好感,而女性则恰恰相反。Men were also more willing to act on this mistakenly perceived mutual attraction. Both men and women were equally attracted to romantically involved opposite-sex friends and those who were single; “hot” friends were hot and “not” friends were not, regardless of their relationship status.男性也更愿意为这种误判的互相吸引付诸行动。男性与女性被异性朋友吸引时,都与对方是否单身无关,在这一点上男女并无差异。帅哥靓更受欢迎,而长相平平的则无人倾心,与对方的感情状况无关。However, men and women differed in the extent to which they saw attached friends as potential romantic partners. Although men were equally as likely to desire “romantic dates” with “taken” friends as with single ones, women were sensitive to their male friends’ relationship status and uninterested in pursuing those who were aly involved with someone else.但在将“名花有主”的异性朋友视为潜在的浪漫对象的程度上,男女之间存在差别。尽管男性不管女性朋友是否单身,都期待和她的“浪漫约会”,但女性对男性朋友的感情状况非常敏感,对追求已经不再单身的男性没有兴趣。In a follow-up study, 249 adults (many of whom were married) were asked to list the positive and negative aspects of being friends with a specific member of the opposite sex. Variables related to romantic attraction (e.g., “our relationship could lead to romantic feelings”) were five times more likely to be listed as negative aspects of the friendship than as positive ones.在一次追踪研究中,研究人员要求249名成年受访者(其中很多人已婚)列出与某位异性保持友谊的优缺点。与浪漫感情有关的变数(比如,我们的友谊可能会发展为恋爱)被列为缺点的几率比列为优点大五倍。However, the differences between men and women appeared here as well. Males were significantly more likely than females to list romantic attraction as a benefit of opposite-sex friendships, and this discrepancy increased as men aged.事实上,这项调查也是男女有别。男性更可能把感情上的互相吸引列为异性友谊带来的好处,而且随着男性年龄的增大,这种差别也在增大。So, can men and women be “just friends?” If we all thought like women, almost certainly. But if we all thought like men, we’d probably be facing a serious overpopulation crisis.因此,男女之间存在纯粹的友谊吗?如果我们都像女人那样想,当然是肯定的。但如果我们都像男人那样去想,那地球上就要人口大爆炸了。 /201210/205905A keen young teacher wanted to introduce her class to the glories of classical music, so she arranged an outing to an afternoon concert. To make the occasion even more memorable, she treated everyone to lemonade, cake, chocs and ices. Just as the party was getting back into their coach, she said to little Sally, ;Have you enjoyed yourself today?;;Oh, yes, miss!; said Sally, ;It was lovely. All except the music, that is.;一位热心的年轻教师想让她的学生多了解一点优秀的古典音乐,就安排了一天下午去听音乐会。为了使这次活动能给大家留下更深的印象,她请大家喝柠檬汽水、吃点心、巧克力和冰淇淋。在大家回来上汽车的时候,她问小萨莉:“你今天玩得好吗?”“噢,好极了,,” 萨莉说,“除了音乐其它都很好。” /201211/211537

IF SHAKIRA, a Colombian pop star, marries her boyfriend, the Spanish national footballer Gerard Piqué, the only unusual things about it would be that she is even more famous than he is and ten years older. Otherwise, theirs would be just a celebrity example of one of the world’s biggest social trends: the rise of international marriages—that is, involving couples of different nationalities. A hundred years ago, such alliances were confined to the elite of the elite. When Randolph Churchill married Jennie Jerome of New York, it seemed as if they had stepped from the pages of a Henry James novel: brash, spirited American heiress peps up the declining fortunes of Britain’s aristocracy. Now, such alliances have become almost commonplace. To confine examples to politicians only: the French president Nicolas Sarkozy is married to the Italian-born Carla Bruni and his prime minister Franois Fillon has a Welsh wife, Penelope Clarke. Nelson Mandela is married to Graa Machel (from Mozambique). Denmark’s newprime minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt is married to a Briton, Stephen Kinnock. And two leading ladies of Asian countries, Aung San Suu Kyi of Myanmar and India’s Sonia Gandhi, are both widows from international marriages. In rich countries alone such unions number at least 10m.试想哥伦比亚流行明星夏奇拉和她的男朋友西班牙国脚Gerard Piqué结婚了,唯一引人关注之事就只是她比她丈夫更有名气,她丈夫比他小十岁这两件事。他们的结合其实只是一个当今社会最大趋势之一的名人案例。什么趋势呢?那就是跨国婚姻的崛起,既包含了两个不同国籍的夫妇的婚姻。一百年前,这样的婚姻只限定在精英与精英之间的联姻。Randolph Churchill 和 Jennie Jerome的婚姻,就像是从Henry James的小说走出的现实故事:自以为是、年轻气盛的美国年轻女继承人让英国没落的贵族在资产财富上重新振兴。现在这样的婚姻已经是司空见惯的事了。单单就政治家而言,就有很多例子:法国总统萨科奇,他的夫人Carla Bruni就是意大利生的,法国总理Franois Fillon有一个威尔士夫人Penelope Clarke,纳尔逊曼德拉娶了来自莫桑比克的夫人Graa Machel,丹麦新的总理Helle Thorning-Schmidt也娶了外籍的英国的妻子Stephen Kinnock,还有两个亚洲国家女领导人缅甸的昂山素季和印度的索尼娅甘地,她们都是跨国婚姻的遗孀。就只发达国家,跨国结婚的夫妇至少有一千万。International marriages matter partly because they reflect—and result from—globalisation. As people holiday or study abroad, or migrate to live and work, the visitors meet and marry locals. Their unions are symbols of cultural integration, and battlefields for conflicts over integration. Few things help immigrants come to terms with their new country more than becoming part of a local family. Though the offspring of such unions may struggle with the barriers of prejudice, at their best international marriages reduce intolerance directly themselves, and indirectly through their progeny.跨国婚姻之所以重要,部分原因是因为它不仅符合并且就是全球化浪潮的产物。人们在国外度假,到异域留学,在别国生活或工作,这些拜访的客人遇见了心上人,然后和当地人喜结连理。他们的结合象征着文化的融合,也充满了文化融合过程中的擦。比起成为当地家庭的一分子,他们更多的感触是接受移民国家时的无助无奈。也许他们的后代会与由于偏见产生的隔阂抗争,但这些跨国情侣会以最佳的方式宽容忍让,或是直接通过自身的努力,或是通过他们的后代。 /201304/234369

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