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湖州解放军第九八医院激光去斑多少钱安咨询湖州整形医院

2019年09月21日 12:56:31来源:美互动

生活大爆炸第一季第九集英语剧本 --6 :9:36 来源: 生活大爆炸第一季第九集英语剧本-Leonard:Okay... the x-tens are online.好...X-连通了-Howard:Gentlemen, I am now about send a signal from this laptop hrough our local ISP racing down fiber-optic cable at the speed of light to San Francisco bouncing off a satellite in geosynchronous orbit to Lisbon, Portugal,where the data packets will be handed off to submerged Trans-Atlantic cables terminating in Halifax, Nova Scotia nd transferred across the continent via microwave relays back to our ISP and the x-ten receiver attached to this... lamp.并把X-接收器连接到这个...台灯先生们,我现在要从这台笔记本上发送一个信号,从我们的本地网络出发经由光纤电缆,以光速抵达旧金山,经由地球同步卫星到达葡萄牙首都里斯本,数据包从跨大西洋海底电缆传递出去中转于加拿大新斯科舍省的哈利法克斯市,经由微波形式横跨大陆传送回我们的本地网络上,-Sheldon:Look at me. Look at me. I've got goose bumps.goose bumps:鸡皮疙瘩 goose:鹅 bumps:肿块,隆起物看看我,看看我,我起鸡皮疙瘩了-Howard:Are we y on the stereo?stereo:立体声,音响音响接好了么?-Raj:Go stereo.试试音响(01 电影"01太空漫游"经典配乐他们在模仿电影中猩猩进化的片断)-Penny:Hey, guys.嘿伙计们-together:Hi. Hello.嗨你好-Penny:It's a little loud.声音有点大 -Howard:No problem-- turning it down.没问题,关小点San Francisco, Lisbon, Halifax... and voila.旧金山、里斯本、哈利法克斯…瞧(法语)-Penny:Okay, thanks.好,谢谢-Leonard:Hang on, hang on. Do you not realize what we just did?hang on:等候 realize:意识到等等,等等,你不会没发觉我们刚做了什么吧?-Penny:Yeah, you turned your stereo down with you laptop.stereo:音响 laptop:笔记本电脑你们用笔记本把音响声关小了-Sheldon:No, we turned our stereo down by sending a signal around the world via the Internet.via:经过,通过 Internet:因特网不,我们是通过网络发送了一个信号,信号周游世界一圈把音响声关小了-Penny:Oh. You know, you can just get one of those universal remotes at Radio Shack.universal:通用的 remotes:遥控 Radio Shack:美国第三大电子零售商你可在Radio Shack买个万能遥控 (美国第三大电子零售商)They're really cheap.真的挺便宜的-Leonard:You don't get it.get it: 明白了,做到你不明白Howard, enable public access.enable:使能够 access:通道Howard启动公用通路-Howard:Public access enabled.enabled:激活的公用通路启动了-Penny:Boy, that's terrific. I'll see you.terrific:棒极了宝贝,太棒了,回见-Leonard:No, hang on, hang on.别,等等,等等See?瞧见了么?-Penny:No.不懂-Sheldon:Someone in Szechwan Province, China is using his computer to turn our lights on and off.Szechwan:四川(中国) Province:省 turn onoff: 打开 关闭中国四川省有个人在用他的电脑开和关我们的台灯-Penny:Well, that's handy.handy:方便的呵,那可真方便Um, here's a question: Why?呃,问题是为什么?-together:Because we can.因为我们有才-Sheldon:They found the remote-control cars.remote:遥控 control:控制他们找到遥控汽车了-Penny:Well, wait, wait, what's on top of that?on top of:在…上边等一下,那上面是什么?-Leonard:Wireless web cams. Wave hello.wireless:无线电 web cams:摄像头 Wave:挥手无线摄像头,打个招呼-Howard:The monster truck is out of Austin, Texas,monster:怪物 truck:卡车 Austin:奥斯汀郡 Texas:德克萨斯州那个怪物卡车是得克萨斯州奥斯汀郡的人在控制and the blue Viper is being operated from suburban Tel Aviv.Viper:蝰蛇 operate:操纵 suburban:郊区 Tel Aviv:特拉维夫(以色列港市)蓝色的蝰蛇是特拉维夫郊区的人在开-Sheldon:You may want to put on slacks.slacks:宽松裤你应该把睡裤穿上-Penny:What?什么?Ew, stop it.让它停下No! Leave me alone!leave sb. alone: 离某人远一点,让他一个人呆着别!离我远点!-Leonard:Who's running the red Corvette?Corvette:轻巡洋舰谁在操纵那辆红色考维特?-Howard:That would be me.是我-Sheldon:You know, in the future when we're disembodied brains in jars,disembodied:无实体的 brains:大脑 jars:罐子你知道,未来当我们只剩下大脑被装在罐子里,we're going to look back at this as eight hours well wasted.look back:回顾 waste:浪费回顾这八小时完全是浪费时间-Raj:I don't want to be in a jar.我可不想被装在罐子里I want my brain in an android body.android:机器人我希望我的大脑放在机器人体内Eight feet tall and ripped.ripped:瘦八英尺高(相当于米) 肌肉强壮-Howard:I'm with you.我也这么想I just have to make sure that if I'm a synthetic human,synthetic:合成的,人造的只是我得确定,如果我是人造人,I'd still be Jewish.Jewish:犹太人还能是个犹太人I promised my mother.promise:承诺我向我妈保过-Raj:I suppose you could have your android penis circumcised,suppose:料想 android:机器人 penis:生殖器 circumcise:割除我想你可以给你的人造小弟弟行割礼but that's something your rabbi would have to discuss with the manufacturer.rabbi:拉比(犹太人的学者) discuss:讨论 manufacturer:制造商不过这事儿你们的拉比(犹太人的学者) 得和制造商谈谈-Sheldon:Not to mention you'd have to power down on Saturdays.not to mention:更不用说 power down:断电 Saturdays:每周六更别说每周六你们还得断电 (犹太人周末不工作为安息日)-Leonard:Sheldon, why is this letter in the trash?trash:垃圾Sheldon这封信为什么会在垃圾桶里?-Sheldon:Well, there's always the possibility that a trash can spontaneously med around the letter,trash can:垃圾桶 spontaneously:自然的 m:形成我想也有可能垃圾桶是环绕着这封信自然形成的but Occam's Razor would suggest that someone threw it out.Occam:奥克姆(姓氏) Razor:剃刀 threw:throw的过去式,仍但用奥坎氏简化论解释的话有人把它给扔了 (Occam's Razor 如无必要勿增实体)-Leonard:It's from the Institute Experimental Physics.Institute:协会 Experimental:实验 Physics:物理学这是物理实验协会的来信They want us to present our paper on the properties of super solidspresent:介绍 paper:论文 property:特性,性能 super solids:超立体他们想让我们在玻色-爱因斯坦凝聚的主题会议上at the Topical Conference on Bose Einstein Condensates.Topical:主题的 Conference:会议 Einstein:爱因斯坦 Condensate:冷凝物发表有关超固体特性的研究成果-Sheldon:I know, I it bee I threw it out.我知道,我看过才扔的-Leonard:Okay, if I may drill down to the bedrock of my question:drill:钻 bedrock:基岩 drill down to the bedrock:刨根问底好,我能刨根问底问问吗?why did you throw it out?你为什么把它扔了?-Sheldon:Because I have no interest in standing in the Rose Room of the Pasadena Marriott in front of a group of judgmental strangershave no interest in sth. sb.: 对…不感兴趣 interest:兴趣 Pasadena:帕萨迪纳(美加州南部城市,因玫瑰碗剧场和玫瑰花车游行而闻名) Marriott:万豪国际酒店集团 judgmental:审判的 strangers:陌生人因为我没兴趣站在帕萨迪纳万豪酒店的玫瑰厅里在一群品头论足的陌生人面前,who wouldn't recognize true genius if it was standing in front of them giving a speech.recognize:认出 genius:天才就算眼前就站着一个真正的天才在演讲他们也绝对察觉不到Which, if I were there, it would be.如果我在那儿,就会是这样-Howard:I don't know, Sheldon.我不觉得啊SheldonThose Topical Conference on Bose Einstein Condensates parties are legendary.parties:派对 legendary:传奇的,名扬四海的 玻色-爱因斯坦凝聚的主题会议的派对可是充满传奇色啊-Leonard:get the parties.别管那些派对了-Howard:get the parties? What a nerd.nerd:呆子别管派对? 真是个书呆子-Leonard:Are there any other honors I've gotten that I don't know about?honors:荣誉 我还得到了什么荣誉是我不知道的?Did UPS drop off a Nobel Prize with my name on it?UPS:包裹运输公司 drop off:落下 Nobel Prize:诺贝尔奖金 联合包裹是不是掉了份印有我名字的诺贝尔奖-Sheldon:Leonard, please don't take this the wrong way,take sth. wrong: 误解Leonard请别理解歪了,but the day you win a Nobel Prize is不过你得诺贝尔奖的那天,the day I begin my research on the drag coefficient of tassels on flying carpets.drag coefficient:牵引系数,阻力系数 coefficient:系数 tassels:穗,流苏 carpets:地毯就是我开始研究飞毯流苏的阻力系数的一天-Raj:Ooh, the only thing missing from that insult was "your mama."insult:辱骂那场挑衅唯一缺的就是一句“你妈妈的”-Howard:I got one.我来说Hey, Leonard, your mama's research methodology is so flawed...methodology:方法 flawed:有缺陷的嘿Leonard,你妈妈的研究方法论太烂了...-Leonard:Shut up, Howard.闭嘴HowardSheldon, we have to do this.Sheldon我们必须这么做-Sheldon:No, we don't.不,我们不用We have to take in nourishment, expel waste,nourishment:食物,滋养品 expel:排出 waste:废物我们必须做的只有汲取营养,排出垃圾,and inhale enough oxygen to keep our cells from dying.inhale:吸入 oxygen:氧气 cells:细胞 dying:死亡吸入足够的氧气来保持我们的细胞活性Everything else is optional.optional:可选择的,非强制的其他都是可有可无的-Leonard:Okay, let me put it this way: I'm doing it.put it this way: 这样表达好的,这样说吧,我要做这个报告-Sheldon:You can't. I'm the lead author.lead:领导 author:作者你不能,我是第一作者-Leonard:Come on, the only reason you're the lead author is because we went alphabetically.alphabetically:字母顺序的行了吧,你是第一作者的唯一原因是我们名字是字母排序的-Sheldon:I let you think we went alphabetically to spare you the humiliation of dealing with the fact that it was my idea.spare:免除 humiliation:羞耻 我让你认为我们是字母排的是为了让你接收事实时免受羞辱,事实是这是我的主意Not to put too fine a point on it,not to put too fine a point [an edge] on it: 不客气[直截了当,坦白]地说坦率地说,but I was throwing you a bone.throw a bone : 把令人失望的东西给了某人【但此处意为让某人捡了便宜】 throw:仍 bone:骨头是我让你捡了个便宜You're welcome.不用客气-Leonard:Excuse me, I designed the experiment that proved the hypothesis.design:设计 prove:明 hypothesis:假设有没有搞错,是我设计了实验验了假设-Sheldon:It doesn't need proving.根本不需要验-Leonard:So the entire scientific commy is just supposed to take your word?entire:整体的 scientific commy:科学界 commy:社会,团体 be supposed to:应该,理应所以整个科学界就这么接受你的理论?-Sheldon:They're not supposed to, but they should.他们不一定会,不过他们应会-Leonard:All right, I don't care what you say,好吧,我才不管你说什么,I'm going to the conference and I'm presenting our findings.conference:会议 present:介绍 findings:(调查或研究的)结果我要去参加会议发表我们的发现-Sheldon:And I bid it.bid:禁止我不准你这样-Leonard:You bid it?你不准?-Sheldon:If I'm not taking credit our work, then nobody is.taking credit :因…而得到好评如果我不去领我们的工作成果荣誉那就没人可以去领-Leonard:So you admit that it's our work?admit:承认那么你承认那是"我们"的工作-Sheldon:No.不Once again, I'm throwing you a bone.再说一遍,是我让你拣了便宜And once again you are welcome.然后再说一次,不用客气-Howard:Oh, no, he didn't!不,他没说过!(企图催眠)-Penny:So, how's it going with Sheldon?那么你和Sheldon怎么样?Are you guys still not talking to each other?你们还是没说话吗?-Leonard:Not only is he still not talking to me,他不仅不跟我说话but there's this thing he does where he stares at you and tries to get your brain to explode.stares at:盯着 brain:脑 explode:使爆炸当他看着你时还老做一件事,想让你脑袋爆炸You know, like in the classic sci-fi movie Scanners.classic:经典 sci-fi:science fiction的缩写,科幻你知道,就像经典科幻小说"夺命凶铃"一样Like... bzzz...像...嗞...咻...Never mind.别管它了How about this one?这件怎么样?It says, I know my physics, but I'm still a fun guy.physics:物理学 fun:有趣就像在说我物理很棒但我还是很风趣-Penny:Wow, I didn't know they still made corduroy suits.corduroy:灯芯绒 suits:西装哇噢,我都不知道现在还有人做灯芯绒西装-Leonard:They don't. That's why I saved this one.现在没有了,所以我才留着这一套-Penny:Okay, well, let's just see what else you have.好的,呃让我们看看你还有什么Okay, here, take this...好的,拿着这个...And this, and this, and these...还有这个,还有这个,还有这些...-Leonard:Is this all stuff you want me to try on?stuff:东西 try on:试穿不会这些都要试吧?-Penny:No, this is stuff want you to throw out.throw out:扔掉不,这些是我希望你能扔了的Seriously, don't even give them to charity.Seriously:严肃的 charity:慈善团体我说真的,连捐都不要捐,You won't be helping anyone.捐了也帮不了任何人What's this?这是什么?-Leonard:That's the Bottle City of Kandor.那是Kandor瓶中城You see, Kandor was the capital city of the planet Krypton.capital:首都 planet:行星 Krypton:氪星是这样的Kandor是氪星的首都It was miniaturized by Brainiac bee Krypton exploded,miniaturize:使小型化 explode:爆炸在氪星大爆炸前被Brainiac缩小了,and then rescued by Superman.rescue:营救 Superman:超人然后被超人拯救了-Penny:Oh. Nice.噢,不错啊-Leonard:It's a lot cooler when girls aren't looking at it.没有女孩看着它的时候感觉可酷多了-Penny:Here, why don't you put these on while I find a shirt and a sport coat that match.shirt:衬衫 coat:外套 match:使相配这儿,穿上这条裤子试试我再找件能搭配衬衣和运动外套-Leonard:Great, I'll be right back.太棒了,我马上回来-Penny:Where are you going? Just put them on.你去哪? 穿上不就得了-Leonard:Here?在这儿?-Penny:Oh, are you shy?你不是害羞吧?-Leonard:No, I'm not shy.不,我可不害羞-Penny:Don't worry. I won't look.别担心,我不会看的-Leonard:I know you won't look. Why would you look?我知道你不会看的,你为什么要看?There's nothing to see... Well, not nothing...又没什么好看的... 呃,也不是什么都没有...-Penny:Sweetie, put the pants on.pants:裤子亲爱的,把裤子穿上-Leonard:Putting them on.穿上穿上-Penny:So, you know, isn't there maybe some way you and Sheldon could compromise on this whole presentation thing?compromise:妥协 presentation:报告那么你知道难道就没个办法,能让你和Sheldon在发表的事上妥协的么?-Leonard:No, no.没有,绝对没有Scientists do not compromise.科学家不会妥协Our minds are trained to synthesize facts and come to inarguable conclusions.train:训练 synthesize:综合 inarguable:不容争辩的 conclusions:结论我们受到的思维训练是处理事实,得到不容置疑的结论Not to mention, Sheldon is bat-crap crazy.not to mention:更不用说 crap:废物 crazy:疯子更别说Sheldon是个破疯子-Penny:What is this?这是什么玩意儿?-Leonard:Oh, careful.小心点That's my original series Battlestar Galactica flight suit.original:原版的 flight:飞行 suit:装那是我的原版太空堡垒卡拉狄加太空-Penny:Oh, why didn't you wear it on Halloween?Halloween:万圣节噢,你万圣节为什么不穿它?-Leonard:Because it's not a costume. It's a flight suit.costume:戏 flight suit:太空因为这不是戏,这是太空-Penny:Okay, all right, moving on.好了,我知道了,继续Oh, wow, a paisley shirt.paisley:(苏格兰)佩斯利涡纹旋花呢哇噢一件Paisley牌的衬衫-Leonard:Uh-huh, it goes with my corduroy suit.go with: 与…相配 corduroy:灯芯绒嗯哼,和我的灯心绒西装是配套的-Penny:If you mean they should end up in the same place, then I agree.如果你是说它们应该放一起那我同意Is this your only tie?tie:领带这不会是你唯一的领带吧? 生活大爆炸 英语剧本。

  • Pollution 污染 --7 ::31 来源: Pollution 污染    Today pollution has become a more serious problem to us. The air, the water and the land are polluted by waste or poisonous things. It does harm to human beings, animals and plants.  We can not have fresh air because many factories have sent poisonous smoke into the air. Beautiful parks are made dirty by plastic tins and bags. Fish die from polluted water. Strange diseases have appeared in some places because of pollution.  I hope scientists can find ways to solve the serious problems. We are looking ward to seeing clear sky, clean rivers and beautiful parks again.  今天污染已经变成一个非常严重的问题空气、水和土壤都被废弃的或有毒的东西所污染它对人类、动物和植物都有害  由于许多工厂向空气中排放有毒气体,我们现在不能呼吸新鲜空气漂亮的公园被废弃的塑料瓶子和垃圾袋所污染鱼死于被污染的水由于污染,一些地方出现了奇怪的疾病  我希望科学家能找到解决这些问题的方法我们期盼能重新见到蓝蓝的天,清澈的小河和美丽的公园。
  • 英文剧本:相信男人 Trust the Man -- ::9 来源: Trust The Man script[Child] I need help! - I'll go. - [Baby] Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, Oh, don't worry, sweetheart. Dad'll be right back. Daddy's not leaving, honey. He's just helping your brother in the bathroom. It's okay, Hey, look at that! What's going on? I'm trying to poop, but I can't. Just relax, David. Don't work so hard. But my stomach hurts. I had to burp, but I need to poop. Well, sometimes ifyou just sit there, a fart will just work its way out. Who said anything about a fart? [ Woman ] Honey! The Terminixguyis fiinished, A fart's just as good as a burp, David, sometimes even better. A fart, a burp or a poop. - [ Clears Throat ] What am I talking about? - [ Man ] Mr, Ponson,,, - you have a problem. - Fantastic, [ David] Here it comes! [ Chattering On TV] I gotta bring these galleys I proofed into work today. Shouldn't your boss be proofin' those? Yeah, she should, but she's behind maternity leave... so I'm covering her. So much taking the job soyou can work on your book. Anyway, it would be great ifyou could drive me. - Oh, sweetie, I can't. Today is Monday. - So? Well, alternate side is in efifiect, so I gotta move the car, - I nto another parking spot? - Yeah. You're not going to drive me because you have to park the car on the other side of the street? Well, you're oversimplifying it now. How's that? You only use the car when you need to drive it 1 0 feet... - into a legal parking spot, - If I'm lucky. That doesn't make any sense! Look, ifwe're not gonna use it, will you just sell it? I like knoWing it's there, Booyah! Bam! Bam! Mmm. Right. So ifthere's an emergency, we always have a way out of Manhattan. Well, you laugh now, but that thing is fully equipped. Tobey, you've got two bottles ofwater in there and four PowerBars. How far is that gonna get us? The car has special meaning to me. Can you deal with that? Why? Look, ifiyou must knoW,,, the first time I saw you, I was in that car. - Fine. - [ keysjangle ] I'll take a cab. [ Passes Wind ] - I gotta go. - All right, baby. - Later. - [ Man On TV] What, areyou kiddin'me? [ WaterTrickles ] Okay, so it sounds like everything's goin' good. - Yeah. - Yeah. I mean, there's still all the same old issues. What are those? What are the same oldissues? - Well, you know, like no sex. - Well, that's your issue. - [Ponson ] I'dsaythat's ourissue, - [ Woman ] No, I'm just not,,, a sex maniac like you are. I'm not a maniac. I just like it. [ Softly] Twice a day. [ Ponson ] What is that look supposed to mean? It's not like I'm saying I like to kill babysquirrels, I like to have sex, - Always from behind. - Now, that is a lie. - That's a lie, - [ Woman ] You knoW it is not, Tom, You know, sometimes I would just like to look at you. Maybe you'd have more luck ifyou did something a little more romantic. The onlyWayto approachyou is firom behind becauseyourback's alWays turned to me, I'm ing. I just like to have a minute to myselfwithout you pawing at me all day. Well, fiorgive me ifil Want to touch myWifie, Here's what I think. I think, if I may say... we could get a lot more work done ifyou'd come in more than once a year. Would you think about it? - We'll think about it. - Yeah. Would you- And, Tom... Iisten to Rebecca and don't- don't paw at her. And just give her some space, okay? And Rebecca, think about having sex with Tom. [ Whispers ] Possibly doggy style. Okay? And I have your cell numbers, right? - Yeah. - Yeah. Therapy always makes me so horny. Did he actually say 揹oggy style"? Yeah. I knew I liked that guy. - I gotta go. - Mmm. No. Tom, I have rehearsal. Don't suck my face off. Did I tell you I had a dream last night thatyou gave me a blow job? Yeah. I had a dream that I gaveyou a German shepherd. Unhand me. And remember, you're picking up David from school... and we need milk. I know. It's my new life- househusband. Hey, dude. You asked it. [Man ] Yo, Miss Pollack, Rebecca, Yo! Come on, Rebecca, Just give us a couple ofipictures! ※[ Hip-hop Folk ] [ Typing ] [ Timer Dings ] [ Honking ] [ Conti nues Honking ] - Yeah, you leavin'? - You wish! - Blow me, dickhead! - [ Tires Screech ] [ Continues, Indistinct] - Megan Sweetlander's office. Please hold. - [ Phone Rings ] - Megan Sweetlander's office. Please hold. - [ Phone Rings ] Megan Sweetlander's office. May I help you? - Hey, it's me. - Oh, God. - I'm swamped here. - Oh, just hang up on them all. [ Phone Rings ] - [ Ringing Stops ] - I did it. Oh, my God. I was kidding! -Jesus, that felt good. - Hey, doyou think I'm crazy? Not compared to other actresses, no. How often do you and my brother have sex? Satisfying sex orjust sex? - Oh, say no more. - I try to, but he won't listen. Ha-ha. You know, we have good- We have good sex. Sometimes. - [ Woman ] Elaine! - Um, I really gotta go. Do you everworry that Tobey'll cheat on you? Onlywith his therapist. I'm hanging up. Uh, untunately, we do not accept unsolicited manuscripts. - You never have time me any- - Thankyou. - [ Woman ] Elaine. - Yes. [ Singsong ] 揂 curveball is the speed ofthe air... - moving fast"- - [ Cell Phone Plays Tune ] - [ Cries ] - Hey. Hey, I'm just ing your on wrist injuries in older pitchers. That's fascinating stuff. Yep. I really blew the lid off carpal tunnel syndrome. - [ Crying ] - Well, at leastyou have a job. When Rebecca asked what I was doing this morning, I said 搕he usual." You think she knew that meant breakfast,jerk off, nap, late lunch? Yeah, well, maybe I shouldn't have quit advertising. As I remember, you hated it, felt empty and hollow... worthless, void of meaning, purposeless- Any ofthis ring a bell? It might be better than this. I'm beginning to feel like a kept boy. - Only I don't know what I'm being kept . - Sex? Sure, ifyou're up it. Rebecca's not. That's weird. She slept with everyone in high school. And even when we do have sex... it's- it's like she's not adventurous anymore. Cottage cheese. It's like she used her sexual adventurousness to lure me in, and she's just normal. She's just normal. Mommy's just normal! I guess you hoped it'd be more like marrying a hooker, huh? Yeah. Except without the payment though. - Speaking ofthat, doyou have anotherword fish lover? - Hold on a second. Excuse me, sir. Can we cut in front ofyou? We gotta get home our nap. We gotta rush. We're in a rush. Um... aficionado? - Doyou take milk? - Oh. I do... but I like to pour it myself. Oh, yeah. I just wanted to say I thinkyou're awesome... and I feel incredible... to be able to, you know... share the stage with you, Miss Pollack. Rebecca. What was your name again? Jasper. - I had a puppy named Jasper. - Hi. That's funny, because my last name is Bernard. [ Laughing ] - Like Saint Bernard. - Right. [ Clears Throat ] Like the dog. - Right. - Yeah. Okay. Well, I'll seeyou tomorrow. Mmm. Oh! Careful. [Man ] Mydear, - Doyou have a moment? - Oh, yeah. I knowyou turned down a film to do this role, and I do appreciate that. I do, however, feel the need to remind you... that this is a play, not a film... and it will require some projection. - It was just a table . - No defenses, okay? [ Clicks Tongue ] Oh,Jasper! [David] Dad, I can't reach it, Help me, Oh, you're close. Reach, Hey, Mom, I wanna take home mine too. Okay. Go ahead. You know you're breaking the rules. What do you mean? That stuffs not supposed to go home till the end oftheyear. Well, David told me he needed- he needed it. Yeah? You also give him chocolate dinner, right? What areyou, the room monitor or something? No. It's refreshing to see someone breaking the rules. - You're a rebel. - Mom, help me! [ Woman ] Okay, Here We go, I'll helpyou too, David,,, - Thankyou. - 'cause your dad would leave you standing here all day. - Wow, you're strong! - [ Chuckles ] Thankyou. Ifyou tell, I'll sayyou did it, and they'll believe me. Come on. [Man ] Come backsoon, Thankyou, So hoW come onlyonce ayear? Well,you don't Want to dissect it too much, It's like a tune-up, Ifyou go regularly, you just become one of those couples... that disappears up their own assholes, you know? As my father used to say. Thankyou that image while I'm eating a whole fish. I don't think fish have assholes. Boys. No more use ofthat word while there's food on the table. Yeah. They got us. - How's the play going? - It's all right. The director's sort of a pretentious moron. - That's a drag. - Hi, Roberto. - Ciao, Miss Pollack. - [ Imitates Waiter] - And this has got to be... - [ Whispers ] Asshole. my last carbohydrate-heavy meal a very long time. [Elaine ]Areyou kidding? You lookgreat, How's the book? - [ Tom Groans ] - I think I'm done. - [ Rebecca ] WoW! [ Elaine ] I'm gonna start sending it out to agents, - Yowsa. - What? I don't knoW What makes me think I knoW anything about kids, - [ Rebecca ] No, it's a terrifiic idea, - Oh, my God. - [ Whispering ] That's Faith Faison. - That's Faith Faison? He aly wants to know when they're making it into a movie. [ Elaine Giggles ] - She sees you. - [Elaine ] What areyou doing? - [ Grunting ] - Sometimes you get- - Tasting the wine. - something caught in your mouth. - [ Slaps Back] - Tobey! - [ Gasps, Laughs ] Faith, wow! - My God! [Faith ] HoW areyou? - [ Mumbles ] - Oh, my God! I can't believeyou're here! [Faith ] Geez! Whoa! Well, no, I alWays come here, You're not gonna fiind better Northern Italian fiood,,, - anywhere in the city. - [ Mouths Words ] - [ Slaps Chair ] That's my husband. - What? - [ Faith Giggles ] - Oh! Well, that's my girlfriend. Of seven years. - Oh! - Elaine. - Hi. - Hi. It's nice to meetyou. - Congratulations on getting married. - Oh, thankyou. Areyou guys gonna? [Tobey] What? We're married. And it's overrated. - What? - [ Laughs ] Uh-oh! - Hi-oh! - [Faith ] I'dbettergo, - [Faith ] So great to seeyou, - [ Tobey] Yeah, - Yeah. - Oh,Jesus Christ. And I hope you don't mind me saying, but I love yourwork. Thankyou very much. You hate that, don't you? [ Laughing ] Bye-bye. So, who was that chick? Who? Tobey! You are the worst. What, Faith? I don't know. Knew her in college. - She an old girlfriend? - No. - She's pretty. - Yeah. You see her boyfriend? I mean, doyou have to work out every day? Did you know, by the way, that muscle sinks faster in the pool? [ Laughing ] He's her husband, actually. Oh. Seems a littleyoung that, doesn't she? You're the only one who thinks you have to be 0 to get married. She probablywanted to do it bee she was completely barren. Oh! That reminds me. I taped the, uh, documentary you... on the Serengeti. Tobey! I said Ferlinghetti. It was work. Oh. Well, hey, come on. Serengeti's cool. Right? Yeah. It's great. See? I'm fun. Mmm. Who knew lobster cannelloni was an aphrodisiac? Is that what this is? - No. It's lobster Ponson. - [ Rebecca Giggling ] You pay Maria when we get home and then meet me in the bedroom. Like sex? Don't ruin it. - Thankyou so much, - [ Maria ] Thankyou. - The kids were great. - The kids loveyou. - David drew a big picture ofbaboon- - That's great. and the little girl. - You get home safe. - Thankyou very much. Thankyou, thankyou, thankyou. I, uh- I have to go to the bathroom. I'm gonna get a drink. [DoorCloses ] Mmm. Mmm! [Toilet Flushes ] [ Gags ] - [ Gagging ] - [RB] [ Wheezing, Choking ] [ Gagging, Choking] [Spits Liquid] What the hell? Huh? Oh! [ Tom Grunts ] [ Grunts ] [ Gags, Vomits ] It was my last night of carbs... and I wanted to take advantage of it. You know, sometimes it's those near-death experiences... that make us wanna participate in life that much more. [ Kisses ] I can still kinda taste the throw up. Good. [ Tom ] Whoa, whoa! Oh! Bouncy, bouncy. Bouncy, bouncy. Just one more thing, then we're gonna go home, okay? - [Man ] Is that it? - Let me get one ofthose. - This one? - No, no, no, Three down from Sports World and one to the left. Uh... this one? No, no. Your other left. Diag- Diagonal from there. Shaved? [ Chuckles ] Ah, good one. That's 3.1 5. Here. Candy the baby. - Good man. - And the candy, one dollar. [ Rebecca ] No, I-I don't Wanna be too hard on him, It's just that I feel like he's not directed, and that makes him unhappy. And the more unhappy he gets, the more desperate he gets. And the more desperate he gets, the less I wanna have sex with him. Oh. Tobey, desperation is eplay. You know, I should probably be... more attentive. Or at least permissive. Doyou everwonder whatyour life would be like... ifyou'd chosen someone different? Like, okay, I was on the train the other day. This guywas sitting across from me. He was wearing this big, cozyVermonty sweater. Just seemed... old-fashioned... Iike he probably had tons ofkids who climb all over him at bedtime. They go sledding in the winter. Pick flowers in the spring. Kill deer in the fall. No. I just did not expect towant to have a babythis soon. A baby? Oh, I don't know. All ofa sudden it just... feels right. Honey, you're soyoung, you know? And Tobey, he's just like a teenager with a checking . Excuse me. These are from theyoung man over in the corner. He wanted you to know that you are, like... awesome? - Who is that? - See ya at rehearsal. I'll tellya later, - [ Tom ] That Was kinda fiun, - [ Rebecca ] Yeah, [ Tom ] Maybe I should become a fiirst grade teacher, Who Was that mother you Were talking to? Who? Oh, that- that's, uh, that's Shannon's mom, you know? She's a divorcee, right? [ Laughs ] I don't think anybody's used that term... since, like, 1 95. She's pretty. I guess. You know, uh, you do kinda owe me. - I owe you? - And I know you're tired. But I have a waywhere you don't have to exert any energy at all. Do you have to wearyour retainer? [ Lisping ] Ifthat's one ofyour tapes, you can get it. ※[ Scatting ] [ Continues Humming ] - [ VCR Clicks ] - [ Humming ] - [Tape Begins ] - Okay. Here's how it's gonna go down. I'm gonna close my eyes... and you have to tell me everything that's happening on TV. No way in hell I'm gonna do that. It's either that or actual sex. You make the call. This is erotic you? - Okay- - Oh. No, no, no. Okay. There's some kind of a credit sequence happening. Just, uh- it's very simple. Black on white titles. Okay, Scorsese. Saveyour breath the good stuff. Now there's some people in the worst set design I have ever seen. - Come on. - Okay, Um- Okay, no, here they go. Here they go. - Wow. Um-yeah, pants are off. - Mm-hmm. Dress is off. Penis is hard. They're starting. A little less like a list, please. - Oh,Jesus. - What? This guy's dick is green and kind of crooked. It's, like, twice the size ofyours! [ Laughs ] - Another, um- anotherwoman's coming in. - Yeah? - She is Chinese. - Nice. - No, No, - No? - Uh, Filipino, - Okay. She's hiking up her unim. And that is a terrible wax that she has. It's all irritated, And- Geez, what would you call that? Um... I guess it's a piercing, I really don't know how to describe it accurately... but whatever it is, it's flaring the lens. [Actors Moaning In Background] [ Seasonal Pop ] - Ho, ho, ho. Cookie, sir? - No, thankyou. - Christmas cookie. Go on, take one. - Get away from me! [ Tobey ] Well, the most important thing... is to remain calm. Honey. Honey. Calm down. Let's just start again. Take the cable remote. The one that says cable. That's right. Hit the power button. What doyou see? Okay. Well, you probably just changed the channel on the TV. So get the TV remote. Not cable, but TV. That's right. Hit three. Nope. That's impossible. Is the TV plugged in? I Wouldlike to have electronic fireedom, Um- - [ Man Scribbling] - You must have a VCR and a cable box. Does... your wife... have this much trouble? Let's not go there again, shall We, Tobey? Why is it so important fioryou to knoW about mypersonal lifie? Hmm? Let's keep this about you. Um... you haven't mentioned death today. There- There is a phrase,,, that you've uttered in, um, yes, in every session, mm-hmm, so far. 揑 mean, we're all going to die. Doesn't that freakyou out?' And you never answer me. Actually, it does seem to me... that this whole kind of television-Tivo tangent thing... is reallyan elaborate avoidance,,, what's really going on. Oh. And... what's really going on? [Shufifling Papers ] You tell me. - [ Elaine Moaning ] - [ Tobey] Come on, baby! Come on, baby! [ Elaine ] Oh! Oh, my God! [ Tobey Grunts ] Wow. Wow. That was- [ Exhales ] That was good. Hoo! I mean, the candles and the whole... Iighting design in general. - Mmm. Thankyou. - That was some setup. - Yeah. - You- You were like, um, that guy from the Yankees. [ Laughing ] That one. That, um- that pitcher that they bring in at the end. - Mariano Rivera, the closer? - Yeah. Huh. Huh. Heh. He always looks so confident... Iike he's gonna do whatever it takes. You know, he almost never loses a game. I bet he's got a really big family. - No. - Oh, I love... those big Spanish families, you know? You know, they've got lots and lots ofkids. Well, they're Catholic. They're not allowed to use birth control. That's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about... valuing cultural reproduction. [ Grunts ] Well, maybe ifthey valued cultural reproduction a little less... wewouldn't be in the middle ofa population explosion... that's running the risk ofusing up all our natural resources. I knowyou don't think that. I do? Doyou believe in fate? I'm not talking about the fact that we're all fated to death... but the fact that there are some things that are meant to happen... and some things that are not meant to happen. I have... no idea. You don't, doyou? [ Stamping ] [DoorSlams ] [Phone Rings ] [Typing] [Ringing] Ponson, Ponson, Ponson, Hirsch,Jacoby Ponson. What's another kind offlower you can get a woman other than a rose? - What about an orchid? - You kidding? - That's even more expensive. - Well, it must be an important occasion. Just trying not to get kicked out ofimyhouse, You could go down to Central Park and pull up something free. That's not a bad idea. But I'd have to wrap it myself. Elaine is not going to kickyou out ofthe house. - She mentioned fate. - Uh-oh. I'd spring the orchid. What kind of porn you looking at? Good old-fashioned man-woman, woman-horse stuff. - You're such a purist. - I am. I thoughtyou were supposed to become less hornywhen you turned 0. - What? - You can't give a woman berries, can you? - Oh, I've taken a wrong turn somewhere. - Ooh, I've gotta go. I think I found the flowers I want. Hi-oh! - Hello? - What kinda sale we talkin' about? - [Beeps ] - [Horse Neighs ] How did I get in here? I'm gonna throw it toyou next. - Good throw. - [ Child ] Me! Me! Mr. Ponson! Mr, Ponson, throW it to me! ThroW it to me! [ Tom ] Hold on, I'm gonna throW one to Liam, - That Was like fiishing, - Hey. The rebel without a cause. - Hey. - [ Child] Sorry, Mr, Ponson, - Nice catch. - Hi. Uh, listen. The kids and I, we're going up to Serendipity... to celebrate the anniversary oftheir father leaving us. - Hi, Mommy. - Hi, honey. Doyou guys wanna come along? - Wait. Soyou wrote that? - Uh-huh. - I love that commercial. - Well- 揋ot milk?' God, it just cuts through all the bullshit. It's- It's inspired. Well, I wouldn't say it's inspired. It's just simple. Sowhat did you do, like take time off towrite a bookor something? Uh, no. Not exactly. - I've thought about that, but- - Oh, you should. You'd be great. Really. I have a sense about these things. Here. Yep. Author. Definitely. You see that there? [ Laughs ] Yeah, I do. [Tobey] "Surrounded byfiriends, she Was happyand snug, "She smiled to herselfiand said,,, 慚aybe lifie in the big city isn't that bad afiter all, ' The end, " WoW, I t would be crazy not to publish this immediately. It's very timely. It's about a little girl battling a dragon. Right, but with women's lib and all- - [ Laughs ] - You see my point. Oh, my God! I hope they like it! They're gonna love it. - There's one thing. - Oh, Tobey, come on. The book is finished. Please, I ca- I can't make any more changes in it. Hey, it's not about the content ofthe book, okay? It's about the presentation. - Okay. - Okay? - Okay. - This picture? Just seems so goody-good. - Well, it is a children's book. - Right. I know that. But the people who publish it aren't children. This is, you know,just- it's just slightly annoying, you know? Show some cleavage. You actually think I should show... cleavage? Mmm. Yes, I d- That's what I'm talkin' about. - Areyou crazy? - What? Kids, they love the beach. And this shows them thatyou're fun. Don't underestimate that. [ Mutters ] Wait a second. You don't- You don't think it's a little... too much? I wanna pay attention to that girl. Standing at 3 fioot 7,, weighing in at 7 pounds of strapping lefty... digs in. - Got a hold ofthat! - That's a home run! - Yep. Touch 'em all. - [Rebecca ] Hello! - What's goin' on? - [ Clears Throat ] Just a little thing that we like to call spoonball! Oh. Okay. Well, Mommy's home. Spoonball is over bee someone gets hurt. AW, come on, Mom, Yeah, come on, Mom, It's the bottom ofithe ninth! We should be having boy time,,, because my dad made me have girl time. - What do you mean, honey? - Dad made me have a play date,,, - with Shannon from my class. - Really? Nobody made you do anything, David. - Theyinvited us to Serendipity, - Oh, really? They? - Come on, Dad, Pitch it! - Yep, Okay, Ow! Oh! - [ Tom ] Ah-ah, - Oh, my- Tom! - Goddamn it! - I- I- Let me see. [ Tobey] Dude, you onlyget one, [ Tom ] This is a complicated one, I gotta get the Wording right, Got it. [ Blows ] - Yea. - Yea. I gotta hit the head. - So? - Please don't ask her anything inappropriate in front of me. I can ask herwhatever I want. such a closed-ofifiperson, it's likeyou have no boundaries, It's better than living surrounded by the Great Wall of China. [ Laughs ] What does that mean? - You- You know what that means? - Mm-hmm. - It means you're closed off. - Like a Chinese person? No, Tom, It meansyou like to talk, but about nothing important,,, so then wheneveryour emotion or resentment or whatever dark stuffyou have builds up... - you throw a spoon at me. - I didn't throw the spoon. - David threw the spoon. - Shut up. We only have a minute to talk bee he gets back. So, um, anything come up? Did he say anything at all? - No. He's been really busy. - Busy? Tobey, busy? - [ Kicks ] Stay out of it. - Ow! It's fiine! It'sjust ourlifiestyle these days, I mean, it's not just our lifestyle. It's our whole society's lifestyle, you know? I mean, there are a lot of people who are... tethered by an old-fashioned sense oflove... - and, uh, fiamily,,, - [ Mouthing Words ] andsometimes I look at them and I Wonder,,, ifliving such a simple life... can actually be completely gratifying... and ifitheyunderstand hoW rich and fiertile,,, Iiving in the gray area is. I mean, because it's all really about being happy. - Right? - Honey- No. Do I wish that there was a little bit more romance? Yes. Of course I do. But it's an ebb, a flow. It's shifting, and I'm on that journey. - What'd I miss? - That's all there is to it. [ Exhales ] Honey. Looks like I finally digested that corn. [Tom Laughing] What? - How much further? -Just one more block. Whoo! Come on. We're close. [ Wind HoWling] Why'dyou park so fiaraWay? This is the only legal spot after 1 1 :00. What the fuck? What? My car is gone! It was right here! Well- They probably towed it. Can we just get a cab? I'm fireezing, But this is a legal spot! They didn't tow this guy's car! Oh, I swear to God- Tobey, would you shut up? Please! All right, It's- It's- It's okay, Elaine, [ Stammering ] They just tow it to the pound. We can get it out. [ Laughs ] I want to get married and have a baby! And you don't. Okay. Let's just get a cab. Oh, sh- I have wasted... seven years of my life with you! Oh, shit. I need... you... to find somewhere else to stay tonight. Hey! [ Tires Screech ] [ Phone Rings ] - [ Ringing ] - Hello? Honey- Honey, what is it? What happened? Aw, sweetie. He did? [ Cell Phone Tune Plays ] Oh, that fucking car! Hey, what's going on? Rebecca's on the other line with her right now. [ Woman ] Hi, Tom. - Pamela? - I hope I'm not getting you at a bad time. Um, no, no. I was just, uh, relieving myself. - What? - I mean, uh- - [ Thud ] - Hello? I mean I- I'm just- I'm- I'm relieved that it's you. Good. [BluesyPop] Come in. - Hey. - Hi. - You all right? - Oh, yeah. - You look a little tense. - Oh. You think? Whoa. Yeah. I guess I am a little tense. Yeah. Let me just- You're strong. Haveyou ever had a, uh- ever had a problem, you know- I guess you haven't been listening to me the last 1 5 years. No, like-like- like anotherWoman problem, Issue. What, do you have one? - Tom? - Please don't say anything. - I'm not sure What's going on- - Hey! - Hi! - Hey! [ Faith ] Hey. Hi. Oh! You're the last person I expect to see. Yeah, well. Here I am. - [ Husband Talking On Phone ] - Eating soup. Yeah. - Yeah. You rememberTom? - Hi. [ Stammers ] Areyou okay? You look tired. Uh, well, actually, um... Elaine and I split up... about, uh- about three weeks ago. Oh, God. I'm sorry. Yeah, well, it was a long relationship- - You know what? I'm gonna go. - Okay. - Bye. - Oh, wait. I thought we were gonna go see a movie together. - I gotta check something out. - Hey. - Watch whereyou're going, asshole. - Sorry. - Shit! - Honey! Honey, lookwho's here. Did you see this prick that just knocked into me? -I shouldhave smackedhim upside the head, - No. No, don't do that. - Honey, rememberTobey? - Hey. - What's up, bro? - Hey. Oh! - All right. - Oh! [ Laughs ] Paper covers rock. Remember that? Hey, do you like music? You know? 'Cause Rand is promoting this great new club... and it's really- it's really hot. - Yeah. You know. - Oh! O-Oh, well, I'd love to. - I mean, ifthat's an invitation. - Absolutely! - Yes. I just need an e-mail address. - I... come... clubbing. Uh... yeah. It's,,, A-S... S-M... A-N-... - 0- at AOL.com. - Okay. [ Laughing ] Got it. One through were taken. Okay. Well, I will e-mail you the details then. - All right. My man. - Assman. [ Laughing ] - Bye. - Okay. - Hi. Areyou- - Norah. Norah? Wow! Hi. I'm so sorry I'm late. I was afraid that they weren't gonna letyou sit down. Oh, it was difficult, but I finally managed to persuade them. [ Laughing ] I neverimagined When I submittedmybook,,, that it would elicit a response from the head ofthe company. I'm grateful you agreed to see me, actually. Are you kidding? Do you know whoyou are? - [ Laughing ] - I think so. I'm sorry. That was- that was crass. I just got out of a relationship with a crass man... nothing to do with gardening. [ Laughing ] Anyway, I don't know. I say these things. - I don't know where they come from. - [ Chuckling ] [ Spits ] Excuse me. - I'm so sorry. - Areyou okay? I'm fine. Areyou okay? Jesus. I'm fine. I'm just wet. You're choking. [ Man ] No, because I called, Because I lefit a message fioryou, Would you- Would you just fuckyou just a- I'm sorry, Look, I'm really sorry, Excuse me, I- I- Yeah. No, I 'm fine. No, you know, I'm a little tense today. Susie,you knoW I- I love talking toyou,,, but I don't think that on my cell phone right noW is- She's horrible, She called me this morning, and she's screaming at me, I'm really in very bad shape, Basically I'm exhausted, The bank is cal I i ng me all the time, and the contractor called twice. I don't know what the fuck I'm doing here. - Really, really dififiicult day, - [ Horn Honks ] The ladyWho lives upstairs firom me,,, that horrible bitch I'm always fighting with? - [ Continues, Indistinct ] - [ Horns Honking ] [ Honking] [ Man ] Douche bag! [ Continues Indistinct ] I want to start off this meeting by first thanking Sensei Goldberg... the use of his dojo. I would like to also welcome the sensei as our newest member... ofthe Broadway division ofSex Addicts R' Us. So that means ifyou are here... the previously scheduled seminar on owning your orgasm, you're in the wrong place. [ Whispers ] Shit. It's been moved to the basement ofOur Lady of Poland on th street. - Thirty fourth? - Yeah, Areyou here the meeting? What? The meeting? Yes. The meeting? Yeah. The meeting. Yeah. I thought- I thought I'd check it out. Welcome, Yourname? - [ Exhales ] Tobey. - Hi, Tobey. Well, my friend Rebecca says... she thinks that men are never really y to have a baby... - and that you have to trap them. - [ Laughs ] What do you think? I don't really think about it. But I certainly thinkyou shouldn't be spending your energy trying to trap a man. You'rewaytoo talented. I believe in fate. I thinkyou're meant to have this time, Elaine. You're meant to- to explore. Sounds likeyou need it. I don't know what I need. Well, I thinkyou know more than you're willing to admit. This is me. Oh. Sweet. Thankyou so much lunch and thewalk. Itwas delicious, don'tyou think? Yes. So doyou think that there's any chance... you're gonna publish my book? You know, Elaine, you're a very talented young woman... and, quite frankly... I was very taken with the photo you sent with your submission. - Mm-hmm. - But I want to be honest with you. I don't like to rush these things. - I like to go slow. - Okay. So let's meet and see how it goes. Okay. Ah, get a room. [ Woman ] It Was never enough, No matter how many times... different positions- none of it made me feel whole. In fact, it just made me feel empty. [ Crunching ] How's the sandwich? Okay, so,,,just a recap, Uh,John is not happy... unless he can fiit his penis inside a hard, inanimate object, Preferably coarse. Right, Sarah, you had a relapse this Week,,, again puttingyourselfi in danger With a poWer tool, And, uh, Gordon,,, the sex you are havi ng with your wife's mother... and your wife's mother's sister is putting your homelife in majorjeopardy. That leaves,,, Tobey, - I'll pass. - [ Man ] Great, SandWich guy's gonna pass? Great. Very trusting. It's traditional that everyone shares. Mm-hmm. Well... I've been having an affair. With a woman... who is not mywife. And, um, [ Laughs ] - [ Paper Crinkles ] - I, uh- I like her to wrap me in deli meats. I need her towrap me in deli meats... in order to achieve an orgasm. Usually ham. Thinly sliced. [ Exhales ] I know it's not normal. No one here knows what that word means, Tobey. [ Woman ] You're amongst firiends, Continue. And hand me the sandwich. Am I allowed to wear fur? Do I, like, give offthat vibe? - Is she attractive? - So funny. Afterwards, all I wanted to do was tell Tobey. He would have died of excitement- a possible threesome. I had a threesome once. It was with two guys who turned out to be gay. I was just kind of the window dressing. It all made sense in retrospect... but I can't tell you what it did my self-esteem. Yeah. It seems really damaged. - What does that mean? - Nothing. You know, I don't get what people think of me... that I have no problems or feelings- I'm perfect, I'm like a robot? No, honey. Nobody thinks that. We all thinkyou're great. We all have problems. You know, I always thought ofa relationship as two people holding a stick. Sometimes the stick is short and you're close and you can look into each other's eyes... and other times it's long and you can barely see the other person... butyou both always hold ontoyour end ofthe stick. You don't let it drop. I'm okay. I'm just stressed. We should go out. Justyou and me. - [ Gasps ] -Jesus, what? [ Whispers ] I just thought of a great guy you. [ Groans ] Oh... I don't know. - [Disco In Club ] - [ Chattering] [Man ] No Weapons in the club, Ifyou got a weapon, you gotta give 'em up at the door. No exceptions. Would you move? [ Man ]All right, Make room fiorher, Hey, Wall Street, make Wayfior the lady, - Hey. How are you? - Hi. How are you? - Good to see you. Have a good time. - Thankyou. - Hey, you're here. - I'm glad I didn't bring my piece. - [ Chuckles ] Hi, HoW areyou? - Hi. - Uh- Where's- Wh-Where's, uh- - Rand? He couldn't make it. Oh- Oh, I'm sorry he couldn't make it. - He, uh- - I'm not. Oh, come on. Let's dance. Oh, no-no. No-No, I don't- I'm not-That's not really my thing. Come on! More of a slow dancer. All right. ※[ Band Stops ] [Applauding, Cheers ] Thankyou. Hey, baby. Will you hold this me? Thankyou. Hold my horn. Uh, that's a little something We call "Serenade fior a French Horn,,, in F-sharp." [ Smacks Lips ] This next one... we call 揓 uniper." [ Sniffs ] And if any ofyou out there know what a juniper plant is... I thinkyou'll understand. Peace. Oh, my God. He just bowed toyou. - It wasn't to me. - It wasn't to me. - He doesn't even know me. - I told him all aboutyou aly. - When? - On the phone. Oh, my God. I didn't even bow back. ※[ Folksy] - I'll introduceyou to him afiter, andyou can boW then, - [ Chuckles ] [ Giggles ] [ Chattering ] Hey, you guys, that was great. So flowing, man. I could feel it tonight- Hey! How's the comedienne? Oh. Mmm. - Oh, my God. - [ Both Laughing, Exclaiming ] - Oh! Oh, dizzy. - You taste as good as ever. - [Rebecca ] You Were great, You Were great tonight, - Oh, thankyou, You were. You were really good. Well, I was just working off that energy that you were sending up to me. Whew! You have a really beautiful voice. Well, I can't take credit that, you know? It's all the big man. Hey! You know, ever since I became a minister... myvocal range has just gotten insane. - You're a minister? - Yes, yes. But don't worry. Ministers are free to nicate. Should we get a drink? Lots of'em. - [Disco ] - Go! Go! [ Crowd Chanting ] Tobey! Tobey! Tobey! Tobey! - [ Laughs ] - [ Chanting Continues ] Go, baby. - [ Glass Breaking] - [ Woman ] OW! Watch it! [ Tobey] Sorry, - Dante. Lewis, buddy. - [ Rock Onjukebox] - [ Dante Grunts ] - [ Lewis Chuckles ] - Good to seeyou, - [ Dante ] Look atyou, What is the deal with you two? Oh, come on. 揧ou taste as good as ever"? We had a thing in college. I didn't tellyou because I didn't Want to discourageyou, - Mmm. - [ Rebecca ] He's sexy! And very... attentive. - Oh. - [ Both Chuckle ] He really is a freak, isn't he? You don't have to marry the guy. - [ Disco ] - [ Both Chuckle ] - So, what are we gonna do about this? - This? Mm-hmm. [ Giggles ] Oh, come on. Don't tell me you haven't thought about it... every time we've seen each other since college. - Mm-hmm. - Uh- Oh, I-I-I've thought about it. Uh- - Sure, you're-you're-you're- - I'm what? - Very- - [ Laughs ] Verywhat? Uh- [ Inhales ] Talk dirty to me. Mm-hmm. [Background: Indie Rock]- [ Dante Lapping, Grunting ] - [ Inhales, Exhales ] [ Gulps ] You taste amazing. Thankyou. Um- Um, could you- could you- could you stop doing whatever that it is thatyou werejust doing... and... Ieave? Oh. - [Disco] - I would be wearing... shorts. And you would... [ Exhales ] be in a swimsuit? - Oh, God.Just relax. - I'm sorry. - It's just, you know, you have a... husband. - Oh. Rand. - What kind of name is that anyway? - Oh, ah- [ Blows Lips ] Mm-mmm. No. - Doesn't matter. Okay? None ofit matters, Tobey. - Hmm? What? What's that mean? I mean, in 50 years, we're gonna be dead... and nobody's gonna remember us or even know we existed. - So, come on. - In 50 years, I'm only gonna be 86. Mmm. Whatever. My point is that this is all so temporary... so let's just enjoy it. - Please? - [ Exhales ] [ Buzzing ] Elaine. - Elaine! - [ Whispering ] Hey- Hey- Elaine,,, is asleep, She's gone to bed. Uh, wait- [ Stammers ] You were just up there? Yes. Yes, I was. Nothing to write home about. I think I got a song out of it. ※[ Hums ] [ Wheezing ] WhyWouldyou do that? WhyWouldyou do that? - Oh. - You know I invited Elaine and her new boyfriend. I know, but he just looks so pathetic. And, you know... - I got. - You did not get, Tom. Well, he's just blathering on about how much he misses Elaine. He can't function without her. He's gotta see her. You know, I wanted somebody here who doesn't know anything about the theater... - so I could have somebody to talk to. - Right. Fine. He's sitting far away from Elaine. Next to Amis. The guy in theyellow turtleneck? - Rebecca, he's your brother. Don't do that to him. - Hey. - My man. - I, uh... - [ Clears Throat ] brought a bottle ofwine. - Thankyou. That's-That's whatyou're supposed to do at a dinner party, right? - [ Tom ] Very grown-up. - Yep. Hey. - Hi. How areyou? - [Elaine] Hello? Your doorwas wide open. [Amis Laughs ] - [Tom ] Hi, Hi, myname's Tom, - Hi. You look so pretty. - Thankyou. - So pretty. Hi. - Goren. - Nice to meet you. Hi, Elaine. - Hello. - Hi, hi. Nice to see you... again. - Oh, wow. Wow, that was a lot ofkisses. - [ Muttering ] - Hello. - [ Laughs ] Hey. Tobey. - Tobey. Tobey. - Let me takeyour coat. - Hiya. - Yeah. - Hereyou go. - Yeah. [ Laughs ] - Takeyour coat too. - Come on. Take it off. - All right. - [Background:jazz]- [Amis ] No, the theater, No, no, no,,, the theater is completely different. I mean, it's all star-driven, you know? Stars, stars, stars, They can't Walk, They can't talk, I mean, it'sjust like the fiilm industry Whereyou hail firom, my dear, Mmm. Actually, Amis, I hail from New Jersey. No? New Jers- [ Chuckles ] Charming. Charming as ever. Tom, you are a lucky man. Spunk doesn't usually come in such a beautiful package. [ Laughs ] [Slurping] You knoW, I,,, I think it's this, uh- these departures... from the literatures which-which makes it worse... in this society's, uh- It goes, uh,,, the-the wrongest. - What? - What do you mean, Goren? No. No, yeah- It-It's- Because it is this, uh, connection... betWeen the past and the fiutures, Uh- Well, because it-it Was there befiore any ofithe other arts, - Except painting. - And dance. [ Slurps ] - This is great wine. - Mm-hmm. Mmm. [ Tobey] Isn't it, [ Sniffs ] Hmm. So, Goren, are you... technically a citizen? [ Utensil Clatters ] There are more than one, um... places which, uh, to be citizens with than this one. - Mmm. - Hmm. So, what, you're on like a limited visa or something? - [Silverware Clatters ] - [ Coughs ] You all right? - I am. I'm- - Areyou okay? [ Coughs ] Wow! This is good soup. [ Wheezes ] [ Mouthing Words ] [ Exhales ] Tobey! - We can't do this. - What? What do-What do-What doyou mean? It's all right. They're, you know- Mm-hmm. We're not together anymore. Doyou get that? But it- But it's not right me, Elaine. [DoorCloses ] Ah- It- I mean, it's Tobey and Elaine. That sounds right to me. Those two names. It's-They-They-They go together. That's your plea? That our names go together? It seems right. It's not right. I'm just starting with someone new, and I'm happy. [ Laughs ] That- That-That- sprocket out there? - He's-He's-He's in a ard, fior Chrissakes! - [ Elaine Laughs ] Better, That is the Tobey that I knoW, Oh, oh, oh, "I think 慣he Canterbury Tales ',,, 搑eally provides a basis all of the modern literatures. - And watch me dance." - You know, you're right, Tobey. You've- You hit the nail on the head! He is. - He's a pretentious sprocket, - [ Tobey] Yes! [ Elaine ] He's a pretentious sprocket,,, with a huge cock! [ Sets Glass On Table ] - [ Sniffs ] - No- Well, he- he- he does not look... Iike he has a huge cock, Well, he does. And you... you don't knoW What a relationship is, [ Glass Clanks ] - [ Clicks ] - Boy, that water pressure in there really sucks. Mmm. It's been a long time, hasn't it? Where'd she find this guy, Zorro, anyway? It's Goren. And let's not talk about him. I gotta be up early Mommy Me. Okay. [Rebecca ] "That's not reallyfiairto say, noW is it? We've known each other a long time. I thinkwe deserve each other's honesty." [ Tobey] "I have been in love Withyou since the moment I saWyou, " 揧ou only thinkyou have." - 揥hat's the difference?' -Jesus, that's a cocksucker of a speech. I get it right? How come I didn't get the cursing gene? You know, I've never had this much trouble remembering my lines. It must be menopause. Becca, you're 38. And would you please not talk aboutyourvagina? You're my sister. It's bad enough that my best friend has sex with you. Walk back to the theater with me, would ya? [ Honks, Tires Squeal ] - [Tires Squealing] - Hey! What the fuck? Hey! Hey-Hey-Hey. Evel Knievel, what the fuck? Since when do you smoke? I know he's seeing someone. You know, I wasn't really sure, but that look confirmed it. Hey, that's not fair. You said you aly knew he was seeing someone. - So he is? - No, I-I-I- I mean, I- I- I know nothing. I'm not the guywho tells someone something like that. I-I refuse to be ced into being that guy. - This is not aboutyou, you little fucking twit. - Well, I- Hey, you hit me! You know, Tom's right aboutyou. You're the, uh, what did he call you? The play-by-play guy. That's whatyou call him, right, the guywho sits in the booth... and talks about everything that's goin' on without ever playing. Never fucking participating. Just letting life pass you by. - Never participating! - Well, ifI'm that guy... then he's the quarterbackwho wants to screw everything with two legs. D-To con-continue the- the-the metaphor, that is. Fuck! Thanks ing with me, Tobey. I'm sorry. I'm so- - Oh, hey. - [ Yells ] - [ Groans ] - [ Laughs ] [Pamela ] Cosmos,,, Wouldyou be a sWeetheart and let Mr, Ponson in? [ Cosmos ] He's alyhere, Mom, So they're really that sensitive, huh? Women don't seem to believe that, but, yes, they are. Oh, so now I'm being lumped with all women? - Pamela, we need to talk about somethin'. - No. I know whatyou're gonna say. Andyou're right, But- But I don't Want to, Look, I can't- I can't do this anymore, We have to stop this, [ Sighs ] - [ Thunderclap ] - [ Car Horn Honks ] - Hey, you wanna see what Cosmos taught me? - Sure. Oh! - Mommy! - [ Rebecca ] Hey, is that my big boy? - Hi, sweetheart. - Hey, we didn't expect you to be home. Well, I- I missed my family, so I came home early. Hmm. Mmm. - Are you wearing cologne? - No. David learned some interesting things on his play date today. Oh, really. Like what? I learned how to silence someone! - How doyou do that? - You hit them in the balls. Oh. [David] Yep, That sounds like a good idea, Okay, everybody, let's get y dinner. Come on. Let's go. Whoops. Okay. Here you go, buddy. Watch your hand. - Here you go. Oh, sorry. - Oops. - There you go. - Thanks. Enjoy. - You okay? - Um... I'm thinking about dropping out ofthe play. - What? Why? - [ David Chuckles ] - Things aren't working out the way I want them to. - Aw, you'll do great. Rebecca, you always have these moments of doubts bee an opening. - You know? I was- - Not about so many things. What are you doin', Tom? I look atyou, I feel like I don't even know whoyou are anymore. - And maybe that's my fault. - No. It's notyour fault. I, uh- I just- I feel lost. And, uh, I don't know who I am right now. [Maggie Whimpers ] You should leave, Tom, till you figure it out. We can't do it fioryou, What a good boy. Eatin' all that spaghetti. [ Clears Throat ] Sorry, I'm late. It's all the idiots. [ Exhales ] - Couldyou explain to me the psychology,,, - Tobey- behind the people who wait in a long line at the store and don't take their money out... until their total is rung up, as if it's a surprise? 揙h, you want money this? "Well, I hadno idea, Wait, While I unzip myfiannypack,,, and dig through my man-purse mywallet." So, do you think you might be avoiding the issue? - Wh-What issue is that? - Thatyou've been following me? [ Laughs ] I think not. Oh. Oh! That was you. I thought- I thought it might have been, but there was just, you know... - so much of a coincidence. - What Wereyou hoping to fiind out, Tobey? That I'm a Libra? That I had a heart attack? Oh, you had a heart attack? I also had a withholding father and an inappropriate mother. - And When I Was , I had a nervous breakdoWn, - [ Blows ] And, I think it's time to terminate your therapy. I'm sorry? Well, this is not working out. Well, Tobey, not you and not me. [ Whispering ] Okay. Okay. [ Groans ] Have a little trust, Tobey. The world is not againstyou. I mean, no wonder his advice was so bad. He had a nervous breakdown. A heart attack. Messed up parents. I mean, could he be any more unhealthy? He said something to me, though, when I left, that really bugged me. He said, 揟he world is not againstyou, Tobey. Have a little trust." Well, that kinda goes against mywhole philosophy. 揟he world is not against me." Huh? I mean, well, then how doyou explain my life? Jesus Christ! Can you just shut up? I mean, I- I don't have time this bullshit aboutyour shrink. Haveyou noticed that I've been kicked out ofmy house and my life is falling apart? Oh, yeah. Okay. I gotta go. [Background: Indie Rock]Do you think I should get Botox? - Definitely. - Really? Uh-huh. Ifyou wanna lose me as your friend. You're so strict. [ Pages Flipping] I saw that bitch at school. She actually said 揾i" to me. - What did you do? - Oh, I showed her. I said 揾i" back and smiled. And then I just walked away. She must be reeling. [ Sighs ] - How are the kids doing? - They're okay. He comes by to see them every day. I just can't bear to look at him. He's in that overly sweet hangdog stage... where I could set him on fire, and he'd thank me it. It's not a bad idea. - How's 揋oren the Terrible"? - [ Inhales ] Terribly boring. He does wanna have a baby though. [ Chattering] Hey, can I have a blintze... this early? It's all I've been thinking about since last night. It's a- It's an acceptable crossover food, right? Why doyou think we're such wiseasses? Probably a good way to avoid thinking about the fact that we're all gonna die. When areyou gonna get over that? Um... never, It's a pretty big deal. You know what I think? I think it's a good way... to avoid taking responsibility anything. It's like, 揌ey, we're onlyjoking, right? We're all gonna die, right?' You and me, we're missing the biggest moments of our lives... 'cause all we can talk about is sports and blintzes. It's just it's, uh... it's pretty depressing not living with your kids. Or the woman you love. Or the woman thatyou love. Just becauseyou happen to be an immensely flawed and selfish human being. Hey, you're not so greatyourself. [ Chuckles ] I think the blintze is fully acceptable as a crossover food... and I would like one myself. - You're the man. - No, you the man. Up top. [Tom ] I guess the fiirst thing I shouldsay,,, is that myname is not Tobey, It's Todd, [ Group ] Hi, Todd. [ Laughs ] No, it's not- It's, uh, it's Tom. - Myname is Tom, - [ Person Sighs ] It reallyis, okay? And, uh, secondly,,, I have- I have no relation at all to deli meats. - [ Murmuring ] - I- I just- I just made it up to try to fit in. Um- I- I don't know- I don't know what I am... but, um, I'm pretty sure that I have a problem. Although, not as- as big a problem as all ofyou seem to have. -[Person Gasps ] - Um, anybodyelse hot? [ Clears Throat ] Uh, I, uh- I also use humor and, uh, complaints about the temperature... as a Wayofidiverting attention,,, from the, uh, from the very serious fact, uh... that I'm ruining my life. And, uh,,, I just- I just thought it would do me some good to tell my real story here today. So, uh... I, uh, I come from a family of poor peasants. - [ Chuckling ] - Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm just kiddin'. Um- [Sofit Pop ] - [ Continues, Indistinct] - [ Ringing ] - [ Continues Ringing ] - [ Goren Grunts ] It-It's hims, again. [Man ] Mabel? George? Come here, please, NoW Mr, Bertram Will bejoining us fior dinner tonight, Please make the arrangements, [ Woman ] Whoo! - [ Woman # ] All right, Debbie. - [ Cheering, Applause ] [ Man ] Confiound it, Where is that daughter ofimine? [ I n Southern Accent ] Oh, Daddy, I'm comin'. [ Continues ] [ Clicks ] - [ Blows ] - [ Clicks ] [ Vocalizing] - Trust us. - Trust us. - We're all about trust. - Come on. - Turn around. - [ Woman ] Okay, Hereyou go, - [ Man ] Come on, [ Continues ] [ Gasping, Cheering ] [ Laughing, Voicing Approval ] - [ Footsteps Approaching, knocks On Door] - Come in. Popular lady. I think these are firom yourhusband, Again, - Break a leg. - Thankyou, [ Sobs ] [ knocks On Door] Sweetheart, I 'm sorry to interrupt your preshow cry. All the best ones have 'em. [ Exhales, Sniffs ] We're all in this together, my dear. All damned to the theater. Condemned to live through our art. we do not know how to live through our lives. [ Whispering ] We are islands. Francis... my director... I am a mother and a wife first and emost... and you should go fuckyourself. [ Sniffs, Sighs ] - [ Chattering] - [Male Announcer] Welcome to tonight's,,, premiere perfiormance ofiEdmund Middleton's Fifty Means. - Oh, these are good seats. - [Announcer Continues, Indistinct ] - [ Elaine ] Okay, - [Announcer] Enjoy the shoW, - That should be me. - ※[ Orchestra: Classical]- What'd you say? - Nothing. [Applauding] [ Male Actor] You go on back to the house, I'll get the rest, [ Rebecca Chuckling] - [Applauding] - ※[ Ends ] [ Whistling] [ I n Southern Accent ] I never thought I 'd say this, but I 'm happy to be home. Nothing much has changed around here, but then again, it never does. [ Both Urinating ] [ Sighs ] I'm miserable. And seein' you miserable isn't helping any. - What arewe gonna do? - I don't know. - We gotta do somethin'. - [ Zips Fly] - [ Flushes Urinal ] - [ Flushes Urinal ] [ Chattering, Indistinct] There she is. You go talk to her. And you go find a pen and a piece ofpaper. [ Clicks Tongue] Hey. I thought thatwas you. Tobey. - Not now, okay? - You don't return my calls. I need a, uh, pen and a piece of paper. It's an emergency. Tobey, why doyou have to make this so hard? Elaine, it's hard me too. Oh, my goodness! Listens, I- I wantyou to stop calling the houses... and, I-I wantyou to stays away from her all the times. Why is everything plural with this guy? [ Goren ] Oh, insult fiace to myfiaces? - Tobey. - What? - This is Rebecca's night, okay? - What? What? I know. - Oh, gosh. I'm sorry, I dropped the pen there. - [ Woman ] Oh, I'll get it, Hey. - Those aren't your flowers, sir. - Y-Y-You don't understand. I-I need to get these to Rebecca Pollack backstage. So- I'm sorry, she doesn't accept stolen flowers in intermissions. Oh, no. C-C- Can you at least just- Can you get her this note? I'm her husband. Please,just give her that. - [Tobey] We're talkin'here, "Gorens, " - Come. - I'm talkin' to her, ifyou don't mind. - I do mind. - It's not gonna happen. - [Tobey] I said I'd like to talk to her, - Release her. - I'm not gonna release her. - [ Goren, TobeyArguing, Indistinct] - [ Usher] Okay. Wait a minute! Hey! That's not- No running. No running. - Stop it! - You 搒htop" it! - [ Usher] Sir, there's no running in the theater, - [ Women Gasping] Oh, my God. Sir, stay right there. There's no running in the theater. - There's no running in the theater. - [ Groans ] - [ Women Gasping] - [ Usher] We got a runner, We got a runner! Okay, - [ Chattering ] - Oh! Pardon me. [ Whispering ] West aisle. - [ Man ] Come on! - Sorry. - Hey! Watch it. You're a jerk. - Oh, God! - [ Man ] Right there, sWeetheart, - [ Woman ] OW! [ Tom ] Whyareyou sWeating? I saw Goren. I pushed him into a plant. I stole some flowers. - [ Tobey] Oh, that sounds great, Goodjob, - [ Tom ] Yeah,you too, ※[ Orchestra: Classical]- ※[ Continues ] - Mrs. Pollack, final scene is up. Thankyou. ※[ Continues ] [jasper] Who knoWs ifishe'll ever come out ofithat room, But I Wouldn't blame her ifishe didn't, Hell, comin'back here afiter so long, fior What? us? this place? SomehoW, It doesn't make a Whole lotta sense to me, - The night air. I t feels good. - This is the last line of the play. - [jasper] You knoW it does, Laura, - So what? I gotta do something. Excuse me. Sorry. - I never thought I'd be able to say that again. - [Audience Members Complaining] - [ Woman ] Stop it! - [ Tom ] Let mejust get through here, Pardon me, Oh! [ Grunts ] [ Man ] Give me back my hair! Give me my hair! Stop him! Ushers, fiull alert! East aisle, Stage approach, - Stop! - [ Yells ] [ Grunts ] [ Exhales ] - [ Usher] Hey! - [ Tobey Grunts ] - [ Usher] Hey! - [ Tobey Grunts ] [ Usher] Get ofif!, [ Grunts ] [ Huffs ] [ Groans, Grunts ] It's okay. - This is my husband. - [ Women Gasping] This loser? This loser. [ Audience Expressing Sympathy] [Applauding] [ Man ] Bravo, [ No Audible Dialogue ] Elaine! Did you like the play? [ Murmuring ] - Come on, let's go. - Wait, wait! You're the one me! Is this part ofthe play? Yes, yes. Yes. It is part ofthe play. Uh, uh, this is the part... ofthe play where we come together... and never leave each other. And some- somehow I feel like it- it was written a long time ago, and I just- I just didn't trust the script, 'cause I don't wanna die. - What? - Wha- Why do I always have to be equated with death? - [ Woman ] I agree, - [ Tobey] What- Wait- Th-That didn't come out right, I- I don't want to be a cold, sarcastic, blocked-off man anymore. I'm not gonna be, And, it's not gonna be easy,,, but I wanna struggle... with you. - I love you. - [ Audience Exclaiming ] And,,, all I can do is say that and let you do with it what you will. And ifyou- ifyou won't be with me... I can accept that. 'Cause I-I Wantyou to be happy, Tobey. Tobey. I have tried... very hard to stop. - But somehow, I still love you. - [ Audience Exclaiming ] - [ Tobey] Oh, my God, Thank God! - [ Elaine Giggles ] 'Cause all that stuff I was saying about being able to let you go, that was just crap, I'd have to hunt you down. Who wants to spend all their life doin' that... - when there's some many other things to do bee we d- - [ Cheering ] [SteWardess ] Sure, I'll be right back, And hoW areyou doing here? Oh, God. Do I look fat here? - Which one are you? - [ Both Laugh ] - You look great, - Excuse me. I don't mean to botheryou... but I recognized you from your book. [ Laughs ] My son and I have spent so many great days in New York together because ofyou. Would you sign it me, please? Sure. [ Clicks Tongue ] You must be a great daddy. Thankyou. We're very proud of him. Oh. Oh, yes. We are very proud of him. Mmm. Okay. Here's how it's gonna go. I'm gonna get up and go into the bathroom on the left. - Mm-hmm. - Wait one minute... and then you come in. One, two, three... -[Sofit Pop ] - [ Clicks Seat Belt ] Seventeen, 1 8... nineteen- DaddyWill be right back, Twenty-four, 5, 6... [ Sniffs ] ty-three- - [ Continues, Indistinct ] - [ Dante ] Elaine has fiound in Tobey,,, a man she can trust to love her,,, to be her rock-solid baseline, - [ T om ] Oh. Here we go. - [ Dante ] In Elaine, Tobey has fiound his lifie's melody,,, - his grace note, - Come on now. Thank you. Hey. Do you, T obias, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife... - to have and to hold, until death doyou part? - Oh... could you not mention death? Uh, uh, 揳s long as we both shall live." - I do. - I do. - Yea! - Whoo! Say 揵ooyah." - Booyah! - [ David] Booyah! [ Squeals, Laughs ] Put me down! [ Tom ] Hey, Tobey... I'm proud ofyou. [ Chattering, Congratulating ] Heh-Hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey! - Hey, hey! Hey! - Baby, baby, go, go! Get him! I just got married. Come on, that's legal. - I was behind the- - That's our car! [ Tobey] Every time! Everytime! Everytime! [ Dante ] All right allyou plant lovers,,, you people lovers, you lifie lovers,,, this one's called "juniper." And it goes like this, 英文 剧本 相信。
  • 我(Me) -- :00:1 来源: 我(Me)my name is jin jia nuo.i years old.i'am a good boy.but my mather good boy.i like eat kfc and friut too.i like play computer games and play swimming.this is me.。
  • 购物 --01 :: 来源: 购物  today is sunday, and it's mother's day. my mother takes me to the times shopping mall in the morning. the mall is very large, and there are many things there. there are food,drinks, and much more.  we buy lots of things. exampie, a box of milk, some clothes and some snacks. we spend 0 yuan on them.  lt's great! we feelso happy!。
  • 盘点四川最吸引人十大景点(三) -- ::59 来源: Looking at a tourist map of Sichuan, you may find a lot of places to your liking. Don't know which one to choose? Then we give you our top Sichuan attractions your reference.看看四川的旅游图,你就会发现,那里有很多你喜欢的地方不知道选择去哪儿旅游?这里我们给你列出四川个最吸引人的地方供你参考Mount Qingcheng 青城山Located to the southwest of Dujiangyan, Sichuan province, Mount Qingcheng can claim to have some strong roots China's Taoism (Daoism). It is a famous historical mountain and one of the nation's major scenic areas.位于四川省都江堰西南方的青城山可谓是中国道家的强大根源青城山是有名的历史名山,是国家重点风景名胜区之一The mountain faces the Chengdu Plain, at the back sporting the Minjiang River, and stretches over an area of 0 square kilometers (,000 hectares). It has 36 peaks, 8 large caves and 7 small caves. Its main peak, Laoxiao Peak, rises up to 1,60 meters. Many temples can be found in the area.青城山面临成都平原,背靠岷江,绵延0公里它有36山峰,8大洞,7小洞主峰老霄顶海拔达1,60米青城山上很多寺庙随处可见In 00, UNESCO included Mount Qingcheng, together with the Dujiangyan Irrigation System, on its World Heritage List.00年青城山同都江堰共同被联合国科教文组织列入世界遗产名录Admission:90 yuan (US$.)person入场费:90元(.美元)人Southern Sichuan Bamboo est四川蜀南竹海Sixty-eight kilometers southeast of Yibin City, you find an extraordinary natural bamboo est, covering a total area of 60,000 mu (,000 hectares), including 500 hills.宜宾市东南方向68公里处,你可以看到一片非凡的天然竹林,总共面积达60,000亩,其中包含500座丘陵The Bamboo est scenic area, situated at an elevation ranging from 600 m to 1,000 m, features as many as 58 different bamboo types. Strong and dense, from a distance they seem to resemble a green ocean. The scenic area also features mountains, rivers, karst caves, lakes and falls. In the middle of the est you find many cultural relics and historical sites, such as the Bamboo est Museum, the old folk residences on Mount Xijia and fish fossils.竹海风景名胜区地处600-00米不等的海拔高度,竹子种类多达58种是竹海的显著特征竹海叶片浓密,从远处看就像一个绿色的海洋山多,河多,还有熔岩洞,湖泊和瀑布同样是竹海风景名胜区的一大特色在竹海中你可以看到很多文化遗产和历史遗迹,如竹海物馆,夕佳山古居民住宅和鱼化石The scenic area has very enjoyable weather with a year-round average temperature of .5℃ (60℉). It is the perfect place to enjoy some fresh air and gaze out over the beautiful landscape. It has been described as "one of the top most beautiful ests in China."竹海风景名胜区气候宜人,一年到头平均气温为.5℃ ,是呼吸新鲜空气和眺望美景的最佳去处竹海风景名胜区有“竹海十佳”之称Admission:85 yuan (US$.3)person入场费:85元(.3美元)人 盘点四川最吸引人十大景点(三)。
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